(no subject)

Hello Journal, 

It is raining outside.
It's hard to stay awake. 
I swear Randy knows I have an appointment at a certain time and leaves a couple minutes before that time so to aggravate me.
I hope it's not gross like this later tonight and tomorrow.
Someone had flowers delievered, and it makes me jealous.
I have to go take fingerprints now.

(no subject)

I'm so tired of people not doing their jobs. I got written up last week or maybe it was the week before and for no good reason. I was missing work, but I only got sick 2 times in the past 5 months for 2 days each. The last time (right before I got written up) I had food poisoning. That's what my work thinks anyway. So back to the subject at hand.
Randy doesn't do shit while he's at work. I don't do a whole lot either, but I do what I'm supposed to do. He doesn't have much to do at all and still doesn't do half of that. GRRR!!!!!!!
I want to let my manager know, but I'll feel like a tattle tell...what to do...what to do.

(no subject)

So. I want very much to get tattoo'd. I know that Dustin wants to do this soon also. I need to save to do this, but I don't want to. I need to talk to Jackett and see how much he paid for what he got done. I need to go somewhere to have stuff drawn up and then priced. 
Idealy I would like to get it done very soon, but realistically it'll take about a month from now to start anything. I figure if I save $100 out of this paycheck and $300 out of the next paycheck  I could get a good amount done. I have to pay a lot of bills out of this paycheck and not so much out of the next one.
I want to get my whole upper arm done, a 1/2 sleeve. I was thinking though that I would wait to get that done. Dustin isn't too fond of the idea and with me being 22 and having to work....it might not be a great idea. Then again I dont really ever wear t-shirts to work. They are all long sleeves of 3/4 length. I think I could manage to do that. I'm torn on the subject so I don't know what to do. If I don't get my 1/2 sleeve done, I dont know what else I would do.
I want my sleeve to be really girly. I want ghost stars and I want hearts and waves and flowers and music notes and a girly skull with bright amazing colors. I just want a mixture of girly things that I like so that it shows off my personality.
I'll have to update later. I'm going to look up some stuff.

(no subject)

I'm tired. I don't feel good. I'm super hungry which is causing my tummy to hurt. Poop!!
Dustin and I got into a fight last night. It was horrible and I still feel bad. I love him so much. Everything is ok now, but it still sucks.  He called me this morning after he left for work and was saying how he just wanted to hold me and be with me and love me. It made me sad because I wanted the same and we just couldn't do that. I think I really hurt him last night and I'm so sorry for that. It just effected him emotionally and today is hard to get through, for both of us.
Gotta go, lunch time. I get to see him now. Thank goodness. I  miss him.

  • Current Mood
    crappy crappy

(no subject)

I want change. My hair is thick and wavy and at time quite frizzy. The underneath is shaved but its about 2 inches long now because I'm trying to grow it back out. I don't do short hair cuts, because it's too much work to make it look good, and  I always end up looking like I have a mushroom cap on my head. I might also want to change the color. I was thinking lighter or darker...underneath. So if you could help me out pleeeease. I'd be much appreciative.
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(no subject)

I hate that I have to keep taking peoples fingerprints. Do these people think I like doing this over and over again? FUCK NO!! It's the worst part of my job. Anyway, my appointments are here so I gots to go...do what I don't like to do. Eww. I have to touch people.

(no subject)

I hate that I've been here for about 4 months and people still ignore me. I mean, it really isn't a big deal, but it does get annoying at times. I exsist...I'm here...everyday. What the crap? People say hey to everyone around me, but not me. Oh well...whatever.

  • Current Mood
    annoyed annoyed


So this is my story. My name is Allison. I work full time at a large company and I love it. It's my second office job and it's much better than the first one I had. I've been here for, coming up on, 4 months now. I thought I was just going to be a receptionist, but ended up taking on different duties and now I work in security. Not the type of security where I'm wearing a uniform and carrying a stick or something, but making badges and taking fingerprints along with a few other responsabilities. Anyway, I lucked out big time and am very greatful for the job I have! WAHOO!! I'm an adult now!

I got out of a bad relationship about 6 months ago and immediatly started dating my bestfriend of 9 years. I was dating Bill and we were together for a little over a year when he got arrested. He was on probation and violated so he was arrested because of that. I waited around while he was in jail for 5 months. I talked to him everyday on the phone and visited him twice a week for 2 1/2 hours all together. I was the most depressed I had ever been in my life. I cried EVERYDAY for hours. I didn't go out to do anything ever. I lived with his mother in a filthy house full of dirty animals. When I say filthy, I mean it. There were 3 dogs and 5 cats, all using one room in the house to pee, on the ground. She didnt clean it up and I wasnt about to. I stayed in my one room all the time. My room and the bathroom were clean and smelled nice because of how I kept it, but the rest of the house was horrible. I couldnt cook any food or eat at home. I was sick often (vomitting) from the smell of the animals urine. I dont know why I stayed as long as I did. Anyway, I thought I was going to marry this guy. I said yes when he asked and had planned on it, seeing children in our future. Things just got to be too much for me and I was even on medication to be able to handle things better, but couldn't. As time went on, my sadness turned to anger. How could he leave me? How could he do what he did, knowing there would be consequences for those actions? If he loved me as much as he says he does, how could he jeopardize that? Not only just those but many other questions crowded my mind. Then he started trying to tell me what I could and couldnt do while he was gone. Saying that I wasnt ALLOWED to go out drinking with my friends from work and he would get crazy mad and yell at me over the phone if wasnt home when he would call. It just really got to be too much and I was getting tired of it. So I decided to go home and live with mom and dad again.

I think I was home for about a week when my birthday came around and my best friend Dustin called and asked if I was doing anything. And of course, I wasnt, so we made plans to go out to dinner and invite a few of our friends to meet us for drinks after. We had a good time. Bill and I began to fight more and more after I moved home and Dustin and I were hanging out more often too. I explained to Bill that I was really confused and needed time to think about things and he wasnt having it. He then began to call and call and call. These calls were about $30 for 15 minutes. So I didnt answer all the time. Dustin and I ended up sleeping together. So yes, in a way I cheated on Bill. Dustin then told me that he loved me and had realized this a little while back, but didnt want to say anything because of what I was going through.  Well, that really messed me up for a little while. I took time to really think about EVERYTHING. I've loved Dustin since I moved to Florida and met him 9 years ago. We were always really close, but we were such good friend nothing ever really came from it.  I always figured that if it were meant to be it would happen. Then when it did, I took the time to think about it. Anyway, I broke up with Bill officially October 27. I went back to his house and got the rest of my things and left the key with his mom. I've only talked to him a couple times since then. He got out in march.

On October 28, Dustin and I went to a halloween party at a friends house. I ran into someone I hadnt seen in quite a while and he asked who I was dating and I said I wasnt sure, but I think Dustin and I were kind of "dating". He laughed. I went to talk to Dustin and told him what happened and what I said and he then asked what I wanted. I asked what he meant by that and he said "What do you want? With me? With us? Because you know what I want." I told Dustin, "I broke up with Bill because I wanted a better life, and I wanted to be happy and with him." So then he said, "So you want to be my girlfriend?" And I said, "yes", and he said, "ok, well then you're my girlfriend." And that was that. Can you believe the first time we made out was at a strip club?! This was before we were going out. And neither one of us likes strip clubs. Dustin is the most amazing guy I've ever met in my life and I felt privileged just to be his friend, his bestfriend, and now...I'm his girlfriend. He's really sensitive and that sometimes can be difficult to deal with, but I do. And to say I deal with it isn't the right wording. I love him, always have, always will. And we both think that this is right and plan on being together for the rest of our lives. He will NOT ask me to marry him though. Not yet. Neither one of us is ready for that step, well, ready isnt the right word...but I dont know what a good one would be. We do however talk about being married and we talk about our wedding (refering to it as "one day when we get married..I mean, if") and we talk about having babies together.

I've never been more sure of ANYTHING in my entire life. My love and my feelings for Dustin havent changed in the 9 years and 5 months that I've known him and I dont think they ever will. My love for him never once faded, I only just hid them so that I could date other people. He truely is my soul mate, my one true love. I've honestly never been more happy in my life than I am right now.

  • Current Mood
    grateful grateful

lunchtime poop

I gotta poop, but I can't leave my desk. Randy went out for lunch. CRAP...literally.

I put my mood as embarrassed only because it looks like he kinda has to poop to or is constipated.
  • Current Mood
    embarrassed poopy
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Someone posted that they hate it when people post about liking cheese. So I figured I'd post about liking cheese.

I like Cheese!!!

It's good. Very yummy in my tummy. My favorite is sharp cheddar. I don't like those stinky cheeses. ICK!

If you don't like cheese then you're weird. If you're lactose intolerant, I'm sorry.

That is all.

  • Current Mood
    amused amused
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